Monday, August 14, 2023

8/14/23 A New Beginning


Lilith, also spelt Lilit, Lilitu, or Lilis, is a female figure in Mesopotamian and Judaic mythology, theorized to be the first wife of Adam and supposedly the primordial she-demon. Lilith is cited as having been "banished" from the Garden of Eden for not complying with and obeying Adam.

    Welcome to Lilith Library, a safe space for me to blog about my experiences. Why subscribe to my blog? Well, I have many stories you might want to hear if you find yourself stuck in line, waiting to go somewhere, or to simply have something to think about while you drink your morning coffee. I'm a 26 year old post-grad art student who majored in writing. I find myself often in strange situations with strange people, and this has been a consistent theme through most of my life. I'm going to try and lay out everything I can without revealing people's identities (unless they give me permission, of course.) I'll give my opinions on current social and political climates. My spirit seems to move through liminal spaces where time can or cannot be a factor, depending on how you look at it, and this has allowed me to think about life in a way that I believe most people don't. This isn't some sort of stretch for my ego, I am just as capable of making mistakes and bad habits as anyone else is; I've made plenty already. But perhaps through writing these entries someone might read them and take something meaningful from it, something they might not have thought of before. I know I experience joy when someone tells me a really interesting story, anyway. People-lore is priceless.


Somewhere I'm resting, probably.
    I try to see things with some sense of humor, mostly because it's a survival mechanism. This world is dark sometimes, to put it mildly. There are terrible things happening everyday and it seems the only thing I can do is what I've always done; laugh about it. Cruel jokes make the most satisfying laughs when it comes from the speaker's own mouth. It's an admittance of the imperfect; an accepting of reality and tossing it back because it's meaningless. Joy must be prioritized. Sadness must be felt. In the present day I feel the ludicrousness of it all. Everyday I turn on the news and something else has collapsed in the world, that is, the structure of the systems around us are falling. It often reminds me of the fall of Rome, and I wonder if they must've felt similarly. Somehow, someway, we're supposed to make ourselves better as the parameters for success become narrower. Therefore, in order for us in the modern day to find happiness we must redefine those parameters internally.

    I was in survival mode for most of my life. I still sort of am. When you grow up with nearly nothing you do what you can, not what you want. I can't express that enough, because I don't think a lot of people understand just how lucky they are (and I don't merely mean that monetarily). People with everything sometimes get a bad hand too, like a family that doesn't support or pay attention to them, or partnerships that become sour; things that (should) mean the most to us. Love is connection in many different forms, and are the most valuable feelings that exist. Without it we live in a spiritual limbo. I can only hope that you find that connection I'm talking about through my words, whether you relate to them or only find my quirky observations entertaining.

    For now I must continue to write every day. The good thing about this is that whenever I do freelance work where I get paid nickels to write for shady websites, I'm stuck with rules. This can go however I choose, so expect it to get weird.

Feel free to leave comments, criticisms, whatever is on your mind. I find them all equally entertaining. 

xoxo K.C.







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